It is important to remember that your child's relationship with his
or her teacher can influence their academic success.
Personality clashes can and do exist. The important
dynamics to consider are whether or not there is a real
communicative difficulty between your child and his or her
teacher, and how do you begin to intervene to resolve those
As children learn and grow, expectations also grow.
This increasing demand for responsibility and
accountability can be a difficult adjustment for some
children. A child's resentment of the increased
demands and expectations can be misdirected toward the
teachers giving the assignments. Consequently,
some children will see their new teacher as the villain
responsible for their dissatisfaction.
On the other end of the spectrum, and quite unfortunately,
some children will actually find themselves in
vulnerable and sometimes even unfair positions when real
problems exist. Sometimes teachers actually do have
personality issues with their students.
Ridicule, favoritism, exclusion, and deliberately
demeaning behaviors exhibited by teachers toward certain
students can be a reality in some situations.
Parents also have to consider the
ramifications of their intervention when their children
are experiencing difficulties in the classroom.
Although children are vulnerable in this situation,
silence is rarely golden when your child's academic
success is at stake. Parents have to begin looking
at academic conflicts with the same points of reference
that they attack professional conflicts. Proceed
professionally and methodically, addressing the issues in
a forthright manner, documenting your meetings, phone
calls, concerns, and request. Drastic responses or
retaliatory behavior to voiced concerns need to be
documented, and immediately involve administrative offices
in all further communications. The school and your
child's teacher must understand that you are aware that
they do not operate in a vacuum, and that there are
ramifications for their mishandling of any given situation
As a parent, your determinations have to be based upon
your ability to view the situation objectively, and
candidly. Whether or not the guilty party is the
teacher or the student is really not the most important
issue that has to be addressed by parents. The
critical aspect to consider is whether or not your child
perceives that he or she is disliked. Parents
and educators must remind themselves what and who is the
priority. The child and his or her academic success.
It's hard for parents not to rush to judgment in favor of
our children when we feel that they are being unfairly
treated. Try to be aware of your child's behavior in
other situations where they are not getting their way.
There is no benefit in your child being successful in
avoiding reasonable request and expectations in the
classroom, but we must also be aware that as human beings,
we all have likes and dislikes. Thing's may not always
be as they seem, ... and sometimes what glitters is gold.
Can Take to Help Your Child:
your child's teacher know how the child views their
relationship as teacher and student, preferably in
Request a conference, take
notes and insist your child be present.
suggestions from your child and the teacher on how
interactions and communications could be improved.
Ask for a written
plan for conflict resolution.
watchful eye on your child's academic performance in
relationship to reported incidences of conflicts.
your child for signs of depression and efforts to avoid the
your child's teacher know that you view the potential
damage of the conflicts as unacceptable, and threatening to the success of
your child's academic performance.
your child's guidance counselor, and administrative
offices that you suspect a problem
and request their help and intervention. Ask for
written documentation of your request.
Intervention Tips Click Here!
Bridges for Kids.org:
Articles of Interest : School Climate -
Teacher's Dirty Looks
Than Paddling, But Emotional Abuse Still Hurts
Teachers may not realize the long-lasting
effects of intimidating their students. Some students
remember the humiliation decades later.
by Claudine Chamberlain,